Thursday, March 29, 2012

Fuckathon Time!!

Two days ago
Me: Do you have to study today
Husband: Yes
Me: Fuck first or fuck after?
Husband: Hummmm... fuck first
Husband: Gotta do some studying today
Me: (the usual) Fuck first or fuck after?
Husband: How about fuck tomorrow?
Me: No... today
Husband: Why today?
Me: Because we have dumb fuck luck
Husband: Hey, no need to get mad
Me: Not mad. We have dumb fuck luck: Every time we say “let’s skip sex tonight” I ovulate. Not taking chances this cycle.
Husband: Ok fuck after then. Wait up for me and we’ll make some good fuck luck
And then there is the once in a blue moon conversation
Husband: Again? We had sex yesterday, can we skip today. I’m really not in the mood tonight
Me: Ok, no problem.
(couple of minutes later)
Husband: Are you watching porn? Is that a vibrator?
Me: Yeah
Husband: Huuuummmm I guess I am in the mood after all
It’s kind of a funny game we play. I stopped pretending we were not having sex with purpose and he stopped pretending he believed me at the advice of a book (What He Can Expect when She is NOT Expecting - which I truly recommend for all couples out there in our situation). Amazingly enough, even though it can feel like a chore sometimes, we still make it work. I gave up on the “just in case no blow jobs” point of view. If we have to do it everyday then he gets blow jobs everyday as foreplay. Why? Because my husband is awesome like that and deserves it. And I am sure he pushes through sometimes as well. After all every month for one week we engage on what we call the “Fuckathon” the every other day (every day this cycle because we’re determined damn it!) fertility window fuck fest. At some point he has to get tired of it. And yes the f word gets thrown around quite a bit during that window (in case you haven’t noticed).
And now? I am here waiting for him to come home to fuck. And then I will go straight into Fertility Friend and mark “PM” under intercourse. It’s the fertility version of singing “I just had seeeeeeeeeeeeeex and it feeeeeeeelt so goooooood” (which is why you guys are listening to that song).

ETA: We did had sex and my temp spiked this morning. I told him if we would skip sex it was going to be dumb fuck luck again. Yeah! I just had seeeeeeeeeeeex!

Month 13 - CD12

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